Sometimes at work, random conversations come up and you don’t really remember how they started…

This happened yesterday here at the office…

I don’t remember how the conversation started, but the question was brought up would I ever consider skydiving?

Skydiving…

Jumping out of a perfectly good airplane…(unless you fly Delta…those planes land upside down)

The short answer is…

Nope.

Sure won’t. 

I have no desire in my bones to consider taking an airplane ride up to 14,000 feet just to jump out of it. 

Hell, I didn’t ride a rollercoaster until I was in the 9th grade. And that was only because I was trying to impress a girl that I liked…

(side note- turns out, she is now a lesbian…So I never really had a chance anyway)

It would take a life or death situation for me to jump out of a perfectly good airplane.

For instance…

If someone had a gun to my wife or kids head and said that I had to jump out of an airplane in the next 24 hours or else…

I’d jump… (obviously)

Now before I jumped I would be visiting every church, synagogue, temple, and other places of worship…Just to make sure I’m good with the big guy upstairs.

It doesn’t matter if they are Baptist, Lutheran, Methodist or Jewish.

I’d even go confess my sins to a Catholic Priest… 

Forgive me father, for I have sinned… It has been my entire life since my last confession…

Take my Hail Mary’s Full of Grace and go on to the next…

Then, I would make my way to skydive.

Other than that, It will be a cold day in Hell…before I jump out of an airplane just for S’s and G’s.

I mean, come on…

Skydiving….S@#%!

-Matt Webb